Kai Chye Peng!

Right, you think, she has finally lost it, what the heck does her title mean? Doesn't she know she has people who read her blog that can't speak Cantonese? Yes, yes, but I was so excited at finding the above in a Chinese bakery I thought it would do for a title.

I was churning out a post a day but had a rest yesterday, I was wondering if I was starting to bore myself with my inane ramblings! Anyhow, I had gone to the post office yesterday to post some Xmas cards off to the UK and Singapore, and also to post 2 knitted gifts off. Postage is not cheap here, not cheap at all. Will have to be earlier next year, send stuff via surface mail. My total postage bill was over $65. Hope it all arrives before Xmas now.

Next stop, the bank, needed to get some cash out. If you use an ATM that is not attached to your bank, or has your bank details on it, you get charged $1.50 per transaction. This used to be the case in the UK, but this fee was waived a while ago. In fact, some banks will charge you $2.50, they call this a convenience fee. The bank charges here are steep. You pay a fee to have chequeing(current) account. About $12.95 a month and you get unlimited transactions. If you have more than $5000 in your account, this fee is waived. You could go for a no fee account, which would give you a total of 10 transactions a month. A transaction can be withdrawing money from the ATM, using your debit card, cashing a cheque, using a cheque. If you go over your free 10, every consequent transaction is 65 cents. Amazing huh? Things to consider and get used to if you're ever thinking of immigrating to Canada. I have talked about the credit history before, but it can be a bothersome problem if you want to purchase anything large and may need a loan. The credit history has to be Canadian. Any Experian report from other countries mean nothing to the financiers here.

When we applied for a credit card for Dave, we had to open a savings account and have $3000 in it at all times, and then he was approved for the card, which has a $3000 credit limit on it. We could have had a higher limit if we had put more money into the account, but really, $5000 sitting in an account earning 0.25% interest per annum, was not attractive. We are on our way to building our credit limit.... Strangely though, when I went shopping at SEARS(Departmental Store, a bit like Debenhams) a few weeks ago, and was offered a credit card, I said ok, fully expecting to be refused as this happened in Costco not so long ago. Well, what do you know, I was approved and they gave me a $4000 credit limit. Mind boggling, but I got credit! Not about to complain. We were advised to get as many cards as possible, no matter the limit and use it to buy everything, just to build the credit history.

It comes as no surprise that if you have no credit history, you may be risky. The fact that you have never borrowed anything before must mean you are rubbish with money. This is the same everywhere. The fact that you have been given credit and pay every month, whether you clear the balance of not, means you are a good risk. It's all upside down. The fact the Canada does not recognise any Credit history that occurs outside North America is just a pain in the butt!

Let's leave this subject, I was talking about kai chye peng. After the bank, I visited a chinese bakery, it differs from normal bakeries as it has things like buns with red bean paste in, japanese buns, and chinese style pastries, a bit like the things you would get at Dim Sum. I walked in knowing what I was going to get and spotted this pastry squares with a reddish middle. Excitement began to build, I recognised it as Kai Chye Peng, it wasn't labelled so I wasn't sure, but I was willing to take the risk to try it out. I couldn't remember the last time I had any, but I could remember what they tasted like and bought some.

I opened the packet on my walk home, bit into one of the squares and was instantly transported by to my childhood days in Malaysia. My mum  would buy me these for a treat. I was in memory heaven as I consumed 3 more squares on my 10 minute walk back to the condo. What a pig. I remember the way how the bits got stuck in my teeth, and that's exactly what happened LOL. Kai Chye Peng- Little chicken biscuits. It was a strange tasting pastry, crispy and flaky, salty, with a dried bit of chicken mixture that was sweet-ish in the middle. I know, doesn't sound great does it? I would say it's not something the west would like, it's a chinese thing, traditional and weird tasting to the palate of the west. I let the kids try some when they returned from school, they were not impressed, more for me, hehehehehe

After many years of living in the UK, with one or two chinese/asian shops nearby, and certain food you could find in a supermarket but at a price, and the price wasn't right mostly, so I did without. It was like living in a food desert devoid of all the things I grew up eating. I always looked forward to our trips back to Malaysia as it gave me a chance to fill up on my favourites to last me a few years when I got back to the UK. It was ok for me, but I felt my children were missing out on a bit of their Chinese heritage.  Well ok, I know, it's only food, but hey, I love food!

Had I lived in London or Birmingham or Manchester, it would  have been better, larger Chinese communities there. Beeston has a thriving Chinese community due to Notthingham University, and in the last few years, Chinese and Asian shops have opened as well as eateries, so all good, things were getting better. Then, we moved to Trinidad, another desert with even higher prices, LOL.

Highway 7 between Bayview and Leslie though, is a haven for all things oriental. My closest grocers is a Chinese one, It sells, dried, frozern and fresh produce. Fresh meat too. Prices are reasonable and the staff friendly. I love all the Chinese veg- kai lan, choy sum, siew pak choy, bok choy, oong choy, kai choy and many more and it's all within reach, only a walk away!

Thus ends my Chinese food drought...one thing I am delighted about, living here...

You're so funny, mummy, you mix all your languages up together!

We're playing dominoes, Jasmine, Dave and I. They are special musical dominoes, but they do not play a tune. You have to match the value of the notes or treble clefs. Anyway, I was not really paying attention as I was thinking of something to pen down on here. It was Dave's turn and he had to pick up as he could not go, and then he said, "Mummy!" I looked up and said, "You cannot go, ah?" This was said just as Mitch was walking past and said, "You're so funny mummy, you mix up all your languages together." What he meant was that I mix English with some Malaysian expressions, and also sometimes Chinese.

For my friends who come from Malaysia and speak several languages and dialects, this is not something unusual. We mix up all all languages together easily. A sentence could contain Malay, English and Chinese words.  For example, " Want to go makan?" This means, "Shall we go out for a meal?" Makan means to eat in Malay, we tend to go out for meals, just like the English would go out to a pub. Another one is,"Mana eh sai, ahn ne kuan eh?" This is a Malay and Hokkien mix. Hokkien is a chinese dialect that I speak. Mana is Malay for where. the sentence means," How can that be?" that's the best I can explain it and literal translation would not have made sense.  We speak like this without thinking, substituting words in other languages with no bother at all.  We do it automatically and it makes our sentences more alive, well, I think so anyway.

Mitchell has a lot of Chinese friends in his new school, in fact, Caucasians are a minority. This is a new experience for him, and for Jasmine too.  For the first time ever, he has thought hard about learning Chinese. I know, I know, I should have thought my children how to speak my Chinese dialect. I was lazy. I was married to Dave, who is English, and so we conversed in English all the time. My Chinese is conversational and therefore not of interpreter standards.  This is probably because I did not go to a Chinese school back home, so I do not read or write in Chinese. Because of this, I am embarrassed to say I am Chinese and call myself Malaysian mostly. This in turn confuses all my friends outside Malaysia, when I reveal I am Chinese, they said, but I thought you said you were Malaysian. Confusing? Not really. I am of Chinese descent, and as far as I know, I have only Chinese blood, no mixed marriages between my great, great grandparents down to my grandparents. I am also Malaysian by citizenship as I was born in Malaysia. It would be as though I called myself English because I was born in England, but had parents of Chinese descent. Confused? Hope not. I'm rambling.

So, no excuses really for not teaching my kids any Chinese, I tried for a while but did not persevere.  I have some friends of mixed German/English marriage and they have spoken to their children in German almost exclusively when on their own with them. The children speak perfect English at school and with their friends, and speak German with their mum. Well, their mum speaks German to them and they understand, but they generally answer in English. Truly bilingual children. I wish I had persevered and my kids now, then they could converse with their friends, in Hokkien at least.

I now try to talk to Mitch and Jas in Cantonese, as this is what is spoken by most of their friends. They just make fun of me though and pretend to talk back in Cantonese, but it's all gobbledygook. They have got the sing song intonation right though. I don't mind and have taught them several phrases they can use with their friends. There is also Chinese school that they can go to, outside of school hours. York District offers several language lessons on a Saturday where our kids could attend, but they are resisting for now.  The language to learn at the moment is Mandarin of course. I can't speak or understand this very well, but can usually get by. For the future though, what with China in the open market, it would be a very useful language to have indeed.

I Am Truly Blessed

All smiles

This blog is devoted to my children whom I am so blessed to have.

Today, my daughter Jasmine, who is 10, had a choir performance with her school choir at the Newmarket Theatre in Newmarket, Ontario. It was a Let the Children Sing Concert, Sleigh Bells Ring.  It was a charity concert and it was raising money for the Childhood Cancer Foundation.  Her school Doncrest Public School was approached about 4 weeks ago to perform in this concert, and was 1 of only 2 school choirs that was asked in the whole of the York District Schools board. This is a terribly short time for a choir to prepare for a performance to the general paying audience but the children and their music teachers Mrs Kraitberg and Mrs Sze worked very hard to learn and sing 14 different songs in this concert.

Doncrest PS Choir, Jas far right, back row

As I write this, Jasmine is halfway through the 2nd performance of the day, the first was at 2pm, which we were audiences at. It was amazing, 60 children from Doncrest PS and 90 children from Poplar Bank PS- a PS in Newmarket, sung their hearts out and gave us a great show. The children were so excited to be on stage and behaved impeccably well.  They had a long day, starting at 9.15 am and finishing at 9.30pm.  Dress rehearsals were in the morning, and  that went on a bit, by lunchtime, they were starving , it was 1.15pm after all.

Jasmine sang with enthusiasm and had a little roll ringing the sleigh bells for one of their songs at the end. She seemed to be really enjoying herself and we are so pleased for her. She had a really sad time in Trinidad last year, not getting on at school and hating the heat. She withdrew into her shell and refused to take part in anything. She found it difficult to make friends in her class and her classmates did not make it easy for her. Her teacher too seemed to ignore her difficulties, Jasmine coasted, did just enough work to get by and was not motivated at all. We could see our little girl getting less and less interested in things. We were concerned and tried to improve this, but failed to do so.  When she found out we were leaving Trinidad, she was very happy.  She would have been happier had we returned to England for good, but Canada was better than Trinidad. This is definitely true so far. She has shone in school, impressed her teachers in music, literacy, math and even PE. Her first report card came back with more Excellents and Goods than Mitchell's and that is really saying something. Jasmine's first report card from Trinidad said satisfactory for everything.  I must add that her teacher in Trinidad did this on purpose on almost everyone's report card, no one got a Good, let alone an Excellent!  Doncrest PS has been really good school for Jasmine and Mitchell too, and it was just by luck that they ended up there.  It was the school in the catchment area for the apartment we were placed in by the company.

Jas walking like an Egyptian

The best thing about it is that she has made many friends. In fact, on her return from her first day at school, she told me she had made a friend. This was such an improvement from Trinidad, where she told me that nobody spoke to her on her first day at school there. In fact, no one spoke to Jasmine for the whole of the 1st week! I guess if you attend an International School in a developing country, it has the rich attending the school and they don't like outsiders. Who knows? But a teacher that fails to see this happening and try to change the situation is unforgivable. In an odd moment of kindness, Mitch who had had a better reception in his class, had approached his teacher with concern, asking her if there was anything she could do to help his sister!  Mitch had been assigned a buddy to introduce him to the school. When I asked Jas's teacher if this could be done for her, she gave some bull-shit explanation why she thought this was unnecessary. Thus subjected my sensitive child in a new country, new school, new weather, new everything to a year of pure misery at school. The one thing she did enjoy at school was pottery club, but that was after school and run by a private teacher.

My boy

Mitchell now, he is going from strength to strength. He had a good year in Trinidad and thrived in school there. The small class of 17 helped and he had the most wonderfully fantastic teacher. She was empathetic and supportive when I approached her about the problems we had with Mitch at home, with his homework mainly. These issues were ironed out and things improved no end, until they ceased to exist.

Mitch has gone form being an average student in the UK to being an A student. I think the Canadian Education System really suits him.  He works extremely hard, is hard on himself and this pays off with test results coming back in the 90-100% mark range. He is working at above the level expected for his grade in almost all subjects, has been asked to join the school band and audition for the school play. He has even managed to impress the Library Teacher, my son, who's not one to bury his head in a book! He has a lot of friends and is very popular and is growing up to be a responsible teenager, if there is such a thing LOL.

Yesterday, when I'd gone in to help at the school library, and stayed for the choir's performance to the school, I was approached by the student teacher that has been teaching him for a month. She was a drama teacher and had her own drama school but was doing an additional teaching qualification to improve her teaching skills, and was telling me how different it was to have to teach Math and Language. She told me what a wonderful pupil Mitch was, how intelligent he was, methodical in problem solving and how amazed she was at his math ability. How he explained his answers in Math, how he set his work out. She was so amazed by the quality of his work she showed it to her boyfriend who is a mathematician, and even he was impressed. If anyone could have burst with pride, it would have been me at that moment. I thanked her, and said he was great and that we were very proud of him. I said , well, you know, his dad has got a Math degree, and tried to make light of it. She then said, well his language skills are great too, and what could I say?

Calzone!

On our trip to Lang Redang 3 years ago

My 2 children are happy in their new school. I have the teachers at Doncrest PS and the pupils there to thank.  There was some discussion that we might move schools at the end of this academic year, as it is very expensive to buy in the school catchment area. Our plans have changed now, we are not able to buy as our house sale in the UK has not materialised. This means we will continue to lease here and keep the kids at Doncrest PS. This news will bring a cheer form Mitch and Jasmine, I'm sure.

Almost as tall as me!

Perhaps I should say here too that we are very lucky that Mitch and Jasmine are healthy, and it's wonderful to be able to raise money for the less fortunate.  Having nursed children with childhood cancers, my thoughts go out to all parents who have had to endure living with childhood cancers.

I tried to upload a video of the choir singing one of their songs, but it didn't work - stil working on it!...

Mistaken Identity

Apologies to anyone who has already read this on Facebook, but this is just too funny not to blog. Here goes........

The alarm went off at 6am, another day begins, I awoke feeling ready to face the day, despite having had a disturbed night, listening to the vertical blinds clashing as I have the window open in the bedroom. Close the window, I hear you say? The apartment's air conditioning was turned off in October, we have had no heating on despite temperatures falling below 0C, but it was still hot! Even at night.  Now, I know what sprouting tomato seedlings feel like, living in a greenhouse.  The blinds are made of rigid plastic and though it was beating out a rhythm, it wasn't what I needed to be hearing throughout the night, I shut the windows eventually, but it was still swaying and clashing, albeit in time with it's own rhythm. It was clash clash, clash clash, clash clash.... purlease be quiet, I want some sleep...

Anyhow, up I get, Dave was getting ready for work, made his own sandwiches, having his breakfast, and he was gone before 6.30am. I decided to make pancakes for the kids brekkie, and steamed some Chinese buns for their lunch. I was helping out at the school library later and was looking forward to that. I had been behaving like a recluse for the past 2 days, wallowing in my disappointment of the house sale falling through, but I also had some knitting to do and also some calls to make to the UK regarding the house, bills, cleaning etc.

Kids were really happy, they love their pancakes, especially with maple syrup and pecan nuts. Off we went to meet the school bus, on my return to the condo, I picked up the post from the mail room. I walked back up the stairs to the apartment, I count that as part of my exercise routine for the day..sometimes, it's the only excercise I do, but I do run up the stairs, about 5 flights.

I open my mail, our Health Insurance cards arrived today... yippeeee, can go and get some of my meds now, but wait a minute, who is Sun Yin Chong???? Got my photo next to that name, but that's not my name, another hurdle to jump...when will it end? When my life does, I guess.....you've read the next quote on my previous blogs, but it's apt here.


Become like the sun. If you do so, all darkness will be dispelled.
No matter what happens, live confidently with the conviction that you,
yourself are the "sun." Of course, in life there are sunny days and
cloudy days. But even on cloudy days,... the sun is still the sun. Even
when you are suffering, it is vital that you strive to keep the sun
shining brightly in your heart. ~Daisaku Ikeda

They must have read this bit on my blog and took it seriously, this is why Ontario Health thinks my name is now SUN Yin and not Su Yin. I have to laugh because if I don't I'd probably cry. When we applied for these, we could see the person serving us really wanted to be somewhere else, just by her body language. It was a Friday, just after midday when we walked up to her counter. We tried to cheer her up, but she was determined not to smile and remain mardy. She appeared to be rushing things and now has got my name wrong on the card.


Could I use my card even though my name was wrong on it? Would it mean that my name all my medical records started here would be wrong too? The reason I am concerned is that I am on long term medication for my blood pressure, so would need to get a prescription for them soon. In addition, I have not been taking one of them as my supply got lost in our move. More importantly, Dave had taken my BP the night before and it was 130/105, and refused to budge, so, I needed to see someone fairly soon.


I called up the helpline number for the health department. Went to all the normal, press 1 if you want English, press 2 if you want this, press 3 if you want that. Eventually, I get to speak to someone, and she gives me a number to call. I call at 8.35, as lines are open at 8.30am. I explained my predicament, and got this in return-
Me- My OHIP card arrived today, and my name is incorrectly spelled on it.
Woman- What documentation did you use to apply for the card?
Me- My Malaysian Passport, 
She stops me in my tracks
Woman- That is not a recognised document, you do not have a Canadian Passport?
Me- No
Woman-What is you status in Canada?
Me- I am here on a work permit
Woman- Well, they must have got your name wrong on the work permit.
Me- I don't think so, as I didn't have my work permit at the time of application, I showed my passport with my visitors Visa to immigration.
Woman- It's a typo then?
Me- I guess it must be
Woman- What do you mean you guess?
(Cogwheels churning and this came to mind,"Pardon me? Did I hear here correctly? What do I mean guess? Why you condescending , rude so and so!")

She questioned me in a condescending tone, in fact the whole conversation was carried out by this person in this manner. I felt as though she was accusing me of something, what I do not know.
Anyhow, then I got asked where I applied for the card, I told her and she said she would get someone to contact me to tell me what to do. I gave her my contact details and we ended the call, I politely thanked her despite her rude treatment of me.


Someone called me back and now I have to get to Sheppard and Yonge and bring along my work permit to get my name corrected. I feel penalised for someone else's mistake, all the documentation was given to her, the forms had been filled out on line and printed out.  Human error I know, and I have a way of resolving it, but it demands time,effort and money. Just as well I am not working, huh?  It's ok, I am meeting Jessica on Wednesday at Yonge and Finch, and will go sort this out before we meet at 10.30.


To err is human, to forgive divine, and I am truly Divine!


All the Chinese in this town have English names, and many are surprised I have not got one, maybe I should be called Divine??? Maybe not, Definitely NOT ! hehehehehehhehee

Happiness is having your things around you

Waiting to be trimmed!

"This feels more like home now,"Mitch said yesterday, as he was walking into the apartment, home from a day at school.  I was happy that he said that. As you know, we have been moving around a bit in the last 18 months. It's good he can call the apartment home. Home is where you heart is, where you lay your hat, where you hopefully feel safe, warm, loved and contented. Of course, home for some can be hell too, especially when I have my "angry week" aka PMT week, home can sure be hell for my loved ones!

Our things arrived from Trinidad on Tuesday. We knew the boxes had arrived via air cargo last week, was awaiting customs clearance and then final delivery. Dave got the customs clearance on Friday but was too late to get the forms to Air Transporter to arrange delivery,  and they were not open on Saturday. Finally, on Monday, all paperwork were in order, cheque paid, elevator at the apartment booked for deliver in Tuesday.... yipppeeee. all systems go. I had a minute of slight trepidation when I thought of how much stuff was arriving and being in a 1000sq ft apartment, was just a tad concerned as to where I was going to house all our things.  We also had the misfortune of losing one box in transit from our house in Vic Gardens to MP's house in Palm Drive and then on to Henderson's the shipping firm... one box less to place, should be a blessing, but in that box were some clothes, costume jewellery, books and my handbags.

Tuesday arrives, after a few more hiccups in the morning, the boxes are at the loading bay of the apartment at about 1pm. I get a call from Dave, delivery guy is at the bay and he can't get in. No worries, I will get hold of security. I call the delivery guy on his cell and he said, it's ok, security had let him in. I wait and wait, and wait some more. I had propped open the front door, waiting for him to arrive. 5 mins, 10 mins, 15 mins, still no delivery guy. I walk towards the elevators, all quiet, no guy, no sound of anyone using elevator......hmmmmm...... what was happening???

I get a call from the delivery guy, "Ummmm, I can't get the skip into the lift,"
Me,"Skip? What skip?"
Guy,"The skip they packed your stuff in,"
Me," Oh. hang on, I'll come down and see,"

this is a similar pic of the box that arrived

So, off I go, unprop door, lock apartment, and go and see what the problem was. I get down to the loading bay, via the garbage and recycle room, and check out the problem.  I have never ever shipped any cargo by air before so did not realise that they put all your boxes in a 'skip', which is a very sturdy cardboard container, nailed to a pallet at it's base, it's about 4x4 feet in size, and yes, it was too wide to get thru the elevator doors. After several seconds of working out what to do, cogwheels madly turning in my head, would have been more useful to have brain cells than cogwheels?, I hear you thinking. Yeah, I know.
I said, " How about if we cut open the boxes and just take the contents up,"
Guy, "Yeah, you could do that, or I could take stuff to your garage if you have one?"
Me,"This is a condo, I have no individual garage! How about we stick to cutting the boxes?"
Guy," Well, it's too big for the elevator, actually, the skips were too big for my tailgate too! Up to you what you want to do"
Me, "Great, let's open the boxes. Is this the only skip? Will you help me take the boxes up?"
Guy,"No, there's another half of one in my truck, and no, my job is to deliver, not to open and cart boxes up"
Me,"OK, you get the 2nd down too whilst I go get a knife and scissors to surgically remove my boxes from the skip," (I did not use the word surgically verbally, but thought it!)
Your job is to deliver? And if there is some complication, the delivery stops where you want to stop! Jobsworth!
I ran back upstairs, called the cavalry in, namely Dave, quickly explained what was happening, asked for his help, said I was taking the knife down.. "Knife? You gonna kill the guy? Cos he won't help you take the boxes up?"
You see how my husband thinks I'm capable of murder just because someone won't do as I ask? To add insult to injury, it's not even angry week!
I told Dave that I only had the elevator till 3 and wasn't sure if I could do it all on my own, before then, and that the knife was for cutting the boxes open, not for killing!

I go back down, second box being carefully positioned on tailgate, I had visions of the guy and the box falling off, and have another problem I had to deal with.  No thanks! Health and safety at work?? My ass, but I still didn't want him to have an accident unloading my things! The 2nd box was upside down, it had printed on it, THIS WAY UP with the customary arrow, but the arrow was pointing down and the words were upside down...... GRRRRRR the family china might have been in that box! LOL

Guy helps me take off the metal straps around the boxes, I said, will you remove the packaging? No such luck lady, did you not just hear me tell you my job was to just pick up, drive and unload? This is what I imagined was running through his mind when he politely refused to take the rubbish!

I get to work, more like an orthopaedic surgeon than a plastic one, I hacked into the box, actually I was more of a carpenter, slicing down the edges to reveal my boxes. I had borrowed the trolley from  security so, I could wheel up 4 boxes at a time. I had 18 boxes. 2 were bike boxes which, when Dave arrived, we took down to our locker for now.

The innards

Dave and I worked well together and all the boxes were brought up by about 2.30, not bad. Dave decided to work from home after that. And that is what he just did, he was like a boy on Christmas morning, opening the boxes, to be reacquainted with things we hadn't seen for a few months, things we forgot existed! That was my feeling, I wanted to leave them all boxed, I didn't know where I could put all that stuff.. Dave sorted through about 10 boxes, some to remain in storage, some to be used. I shyed away from it all, apart from when it was my things, I sorted and placed them appropriately for the moment!

The Hi-Fi was unpacked, finally, some music through some loud speakers! That's reminded me we have that now, just put some Prince on. Hi-fi's in the bedroom at the moment, no space in the living area because we have the Christmas tree up, it's not trimmed as yet, need to find a place where we have an electric socket! Want to know what the first thing Dave unpacked was? Yes, the Hi Fi, and 2nd? Yes, the Christmas tree, Dave just loves his Christmas tree, see the boy reference above? Love him, love him lots and lots and lots.

Shouts of joy and excitement greeted us as Mitch and Jas returned from school that day... our things have arrived!!! Jasmine opened her suitcase stuffed with her soft toys and for the rest of the evening was cuddling them each in turn, talking to them as if they were her long lost children. She offered Mitch his toys, but he poo pooed them. Jasmine was so affronted and told the toys not to worry , that she would love them even if Mitchell wouldn't..... sweeeet or what. Haven't seen my girl so happy for a while.

Cool girl with her cool toys

One of the reasons Dave wanted to go through all the boxes was to see if we were indeed missing a box.  We had 18 in total, so that meant 1 was missing. We sorted them through, and the box with my handbags had arrived! It transpired that we had got the list wrong, nothing was missing after all! More to celebrate...and we did, Dave and I after an exhausting afternoon of carting boxes and unpacking , sorting, repacking, taking boxes apart, we went out to our favourite cheap Chinese veggie restaurant for dinner, kids did not want to come, so, I went and got them a takeaway of char siew and roast duck rice!

We met 2 lovely people at the restaurant, but that is fodder for another post.....

We have one of these dolls Dave brought back from Prague, I have always wanted one of these as a child, and it's one of the things I'm glad we unpacked!

The tree fully trimmed

Life is a Roller Coaster

Down we go, only to be going up again.

we are on the up, waiting to go down!

Life is a Roller Coaster, Just got to ride it ( Ronan Keating), na, na, na, na...... 
Ups and downs, peaks and troughs, on and on, round and round.  
House sale has fallen through, but hey, we still have a roof over our heads, we have our health, we have healthy children, we have enough, we are well loved, we are honest and kind, we have friends and family, we have all our stuff from Trinidad and no where to put them, hahahahahahaha. Ok, ok, better stop before I become hysterical.

I guess I am just counting my blessings to make myself feel better. Things do not always go to plan, no matter how well you may have planned it. Being prepared for every eventuality is the key.  I have contingency plans set and they are off on a roll as I type this, the house continues to be cleared of it's contents, thanks to my wonderful friends Katharina and Jonathon, mainly Kathatina; the cleaners should be in it now if not later to spruce it up, the agents are raring to go again on the hard sell, the letting agent is also at the ready to put the house on the letting market when they have the word go from us. All planned, all sorted...... why then do I still feel so dejected?

Plan of action

Here hoping my ride does not end like this!

If there was anything I could wish for, it would be to have the ability to stay positive at all times, be optimistic even when staring at the open mouth of doom! Have the ability to let nothing, and I mean nothing get me down....there are a few quotes I could put in here that will help. One from Helen Keller, born with multiple disabilities and yet have the tenacity and amazing ability to look at life positively. She said,"When one door of happiness closes, another opens; but often we look so long at the closed door that we do not see the one which has been opened for us." 

Yes, we were happy when we thought we'd sold the house. Let me rephrase that, when we had an offer on the house and thought the house sale was going through. So, that door of happiness is now closed, and I am looking forward to the next open door of happiness to add to my collection of open doors of happiness. 

Things are forever changing, sometimes for the better, sometimes not. What our buyer has taught us is do not put all your eggs in one basket, old saying huh? So true though. We had believed her when she said she wanted a quick exchange, she did not want to wait, therefore we took the house of the market for her. Weeks later and the goods weren't delivered, we still gave her the benefit of the doubt, we treated her like we, ourselves, would want to be treated. Again, another old but great saying. We waited patiently, and what this did for us was give us time. Time to settle into our new lives, new place to rest our heads, new everything....it gave us time to look around, get a feel of the place, time for the kids to settle in school and time for us to decide where we would really like to be living. All in all, perhaps I should thank the buyer for this time, but I would not only thank her but kiss her if the sale had gone through, hehehehe. 


Forgive all the quotes and old sayings, my ramblings are full of other's ramblings today, hope I do not get done for plagiarism! I would like to share a quote my brother posted the other day, about flux and change.


An appreciation of the constantly changing nature of all things is the key to happiness, for it means that no matter how bad a situation is, it will change. No misfortune is permanent; no misfortune insurmountable. ~Daisaku Ike

The sun is shining today, the temp about -1C, it looks like it's going to be a great day.....and it will be. A quote stolen from my brother to end.
Become like the sun. If you do so, all darkness will be dispelled.
No matter what happens, live confidently with the conviction that you,
yourself are the "sun." Of course, in life there are sunny days and
cloudy days. But even on cloudy days, the sun is still the sun. Even
when you are suffering, it is vital that you strive to keep the sun
shining brightly in your heart. ~Daisaku Ikeda

Not quite finished without mentioning some of the disasters that are happening around the world today, in Cambodia and New Zealand, and the madness of North Korea.....in the bigger scheme of things my worries, stresses and problems are nothing compared to these. They are real, but nothing that cannot be resolved.

You learn something new everyday

William and Kate

 On Facebook this morning, Betty had posted, "‎29th April 2011 Westminster Abbey. Be there or be square!" and I had replied,"I'd rather be square, the wedding will be funded by public funds mostly, as you can see I am not a royalist, on top of that it will probably be a public holiday, more loss of revenue... but they chose a good date, my wedding anniversary! LOL"

Kate's ring which was Lady Diana's

So, I was wrong, our comments bounced backward and forwards and I learnt the Queen does not get a salary, she and the Middletons will pay for the wedding, but the cost of security will be born by public funds.

The happy couple

the Queen on her coronation, she looked lovely

I learnt that The Queen receives stipends to pay for official expenses--her office,her workers,her job-related travel expenses, and it's quite a modest amount she receives compared to other heads of state. Paco(2010) stated that it cost £41.5 million to fund the royal household last year. The money goes towards a number of resources which enable Her Majesty to carry out her official duties. These include: Royal travel for official engagements in the UK and overseas; the maintenance of Royal residences which are used for formal entertaining and ceremonial events; funding for the work of The Duke of Edinburgh which supports and complements that of The Queen and salaries for employees of the Royal Household who support and administrate the work of Her Majesty as Head of State. (CG in Yahoo Answers, http://uk.answers.yahoo.com/question/index?qid=20100131134615AAztLyf) if you want to know more on this subject.

The Queen and her corgies

Betty the font of all knowledge goes on to purport that, "Her total wealth is divided into two parts. One is a Venetian-style fondo (trust), that is, it is inalienable and must be passed on to her heir, free from inheritance tax. The second part of her wealth consists of her private collection of castles, jewelry, and art, and a portfolio of blue chip stocks and bonds and real estate investments around the world. Her investment portfolio is estimated to be worth £3 billion"(Betty Teh, 2010). In addition to this," The most important secret is that the Queen is the world's ultimate ``insider trader.'' She not only gets tips from British financiers, but also has access to all the state secrets, through the ``boxes.'' Thus, if the Queen learns from among all public and private British Empire intelligence and economic warfare entities reporting to her, for example, that Nigeria is about to be destabilized, she can immediately call her broker. Under the secrecy laws of the British Empire, it would be unthinkable for anyone to consider pressing charges of insider trading and conflict of interest against the sovereign: In fact, only a handful of trusted advisers would ever know" (Betty Teh, 2010)

So, there you go, a short and sweet lesson on the Queen's finances courtesy of Betty. I admit I was wrong, I thought the Queen did get a salary from the state, after all she is the state.  She receives stipends, is that like expenses? Let me check, 

sti·pend  (stpnd, -pnd)

n.

A fixed and regular payment, such as a salary for services rendered or an allowance.

---

[Middle English stipendie, from Old French, from Latin stpendium, soldier's pay, from*stipipendium : stips, stip-, a small payment + pendere, to weigh, pay; see suspend.]

( http://www.thefreedictionary.com/stipend)

I see the word salary up there, are we just splitting hairs here? Anyhow, I am not bothered, what-e-va, I am not a royalist and will never be one. The royals do a good job and have a role in society, I will give them that. They are so wealthy, their wealth begets wealth, and I am sure they are not taking advantage of the taxpayers, so I will leave the subject here.

Betty Teh

 Suyin and Dave
What I do want to ramble on about is how I learnt something new today, discussing this with my friend Betty the Brainbox, even if her brain is currently embedded in Angry Birds. I know I have waxed lyrical about the wonders of technology before, but here we are, she's in Kuala Lumpur, I'm in Toronto, it's morning here, night there, and we're talking about the Queen of England! Oh, and another thing I got wrong? My wedding anniversary is on the 28th of April, not the 29th!!!

First School photos in Canada,2010

It's that time of year, where the kids get their photos done at school.  They are taken at this time of the year so that we can give the photos away as gifts for Christmas.

The order form has come back, 7 photo options for each child. Head shots and head and torso shots. Packages of photos on offer are  8x10, 5x7, magnets, passport size,  calendars, Christmas greeting cards, collages, you name it, you can have the photo made to order. The question remains, which pack to get. Who would like the photos apart from us?  We decided grandparents would like a copy of each. Perhaps a 5x7 each, so we need 3 5x7s, but is there such a package? Nah, that would be far too easy after long deliberation on which head shot to go for in the first place.

In the past, especially in the first few years when these photos were done, and the children still knew how to smile naturally, we would buy a combination pack of different sizes, give some away to friends and family who live far from us. Keep one for ourselves and find ourselves left with several copies of the same photo. In our recent move to Trinidad and then Toronto, I have come across several copies of these photos, lovely to have but not in such quantity.

In the latter years, we didn't purchase the photos if they weren't any good, we just didn't buy them. Jasmine has forgotten how to smile naturally in front of the camera. She has the loveliest smile, and she's got a beautiful face, but get her to smile for a camera and it just doesn't compute! The pixels just can't undo that forced smile that somehow makes her look hamster cheeked! She also loves making funny faces for the camera, which is perfectly fine but maybe not for school photos. Mitch has no such problem, that boy s so photogenic, I think he should be a model!

So, we need 3 5x7s, but end up getting 4 as we can't just get 3. Anyone wanting a spare photo of my kids, email me LOL.

Don't sweat the small things

Easier said than done..... don't sweat the small things, I was advised that after having posted some of my frustrations on facebook about the trials and tribulations of selling our house in the UK. We all know selling or buying property is a big hassle and stressful. It's not as though you were buying a pair of shoes, you can try it for size, have a good look in the mirror, see if it looks fantastic, dressing up your dainty feet, or in my case disguise the barges I have for feet. Some shoes make my feet look small and some make them look terrible, like ballet pumps, my wide feet just look like stuffed marrows in those, puffy and unsightly. And after this purchase, if you change your mind, you can return the shoes, as long as you have not worn it and still have the receipt.

With a house, you view it once, like it, view it again just to make sure. Some houses you walk in and you think yeah, got good vibes, some you walk in and it's a straight no no. Call it instinct if you like. I am not one to believe in ghosts or spirits or all that mumbo jumbo, but more and more I am beginning to change my thinking. It's probably because I cannot explain the paranormal in a scientifically proven way that I am sceptical about it. I am sure there is something in it, though what, I do not know.

When we went to view 5 Fellows Road, just over 10 years ago, we had Mitchell who was nearly 2 and a half, and Jasmine who was just 2 months old with us. It was a lovely summers day, the house was empty, had a lounge diner, large kitchen, 3 double bedrooms upstairs and a lovely patio out back through french doors from the dining room. The garden was larger than the one we had in Bristol. It needed a bit of work, but it felt right; somehow the house made us feel like we would be happy there. Mitch had gone and sat on the steps leading down onto the patio, reading his Thomas the Tank picture book. How he loved Thomas and all his friends.

The funny thing about the house was that I had gone into the estate agents to pick up details of a house I had seen advertised and picked up Fellows Road by mistake. It wasn't even one that we considered as it was about £10,000 above our budget at the time. As I had the details, we decided to go for a walk to see it before we arranged a viewing. We found that we really liked the tree lined street, with it's semis and detached houses mostly mock Tudor style. We arranged a viewing, then another just before we left to go back to Bristol, where we were living but had to relocate to Nottingham in 2 months time. We put in an offer and it was accepted and 8 weeks later the house was ours. Now with a house purchase, you put in an offer, you buy it, but you cannot take it back!

We made it our home and slowly began to make improvements as our finances allowed. We were happy there, the kids loved their little house and were very upset when we told them of our decision to sell it, with our imminent move to Canada after having lived in Trinidad for almost a year.

So, a few major life changes coming up. Another big move, change of job for Dave, a change of schools for the kids, a change of country and culture for us all, selling of our family home in Beeston, and hopefully purchasing a new home in Canada. All in all, if you look at it from a mental health point of view, a recipe for adventure or disaster depending on the individuals mental well being!

Dave and the kids have adapted well and appear to be coping. The kids are happy in school and have made many friends, and for this I am grateful. My resilient children. Jasmine is definitely happier and is really enjoying school and this is reflected in the quality of school work she is producing. Mitch is entering the teenage years, and therefore his progress is up and down, more up I might add. He is working very hard at school and is as conscientious as ever, maybe not so eager to please, but this is a good thing - I would prefer him to work hard for his self progress than to try to please his teachers.

Dave is adapting to work and is wielding his way into the psyche of the workforce here. His role is slightly different here compared to Trini, but still as challenging. Things are going well.

I am not sure where this is going, my thoughts are truly rambling tonight. I guess that just leaves me. I am not working as yet. I have applied to the College of Nurses, Ontario for my license to practice in this province. It will take another 9-10 weeks to process, and if I qualify, I will be able to work here as a nurse, and will be expected to sit an exam to get a permanent license. My work permit application has gone back to the immigration department to have some restrictions removed, following a medical to prove I wasn't a threat to the public health. I am not sure whether I want to nurse anymore. I feel like I am at a crossroads.....

For a person that is not working, I am tired. I am tired of all the hurdles we have had to jump across, sometimes stumbling and falling flat on our faces. Tired of picking myself up, dusting the dirt off, and trying to jump again before all the wounds have healed. Adapting to life here has not been easy for Dave or I. I have blogged about credit history, talked about my work permit, no driving history on Canada meaning our insurance premium is sky high, driving on the right, all whilst also trying to sell a house back home. I am trying hard not to sweat the hard stuff. Mostly I succeed, but I have very little distraction, being at home all the time.

I feel exhausted by all that is going on in our lives. I want to go AWOL like the buyer of our house has, and answer to no one. I don't want to think about anything for a while. Perhaps I ought to have another go at meditation, find my inner peace; that warm, bright light, that will help me stay calm and cool when the heat is on.

In the big scheme of things, all this will seem trivial, when we eventually sell the house, or let it out again. It's all sorted, thought out. In some ways, perhaps the buyer has done us a favour, in fact, I know she has. By not completing the quick sale that we expected, she has prevented us from rushing into the property market here. I remember saying to Dave that I do not really want to make quick, rash decisions that we may regret later, when we were here in June, checking Toronto out before our trip back to the UK for the summer.

I got what I wanted, but I can't help feeling this dragging feeling, pulling my spirits down....
It's just a phase, I know, and I will bounce back before long But I have been hit with this fatigue since yesterday afternoon and cannot seem to shake it. Part of me thinks my body's fighting a virus, but another part thinks it may be psychosomatic. Whatever it is, I don't like it! I want it to go away.

Sounds like I'm feeling sorry for myself, doesn't it? Maybe I am, so what? I'm entitled just as the next person is , hehehehehe. I am glad I wrote this down, I am beginning to feel better already. Beginning to see the lighter side of life...... I know things will improve, I need to be more patient, and it will all fall into place, and I will feel triumphant, a bit like when you finish a jigsaw, putting the last piece of the puzzle down, the picture complete. What is the picture? We'll just have to wait and see.

Don't just stand there, do something!

You know the saying, "Don't count your chicks before they are hatched". Well, we've been trying so hard not to do that with regards to our house sale, but it was difficult. We had hoped to sell the house, get the equity, pay off all our debts in the UK and still have enough left over for a down payment on a house here in Canada. Starting afresh, new country, new house, clean slate...We have viewed so many properties here to get a feel of what it is we wanted, been a lovely exercise, but things are not going to plan, eggs have not hatched, and the champagne in the fridge remain unopened.

Was such a lovely thought, we hung on to it. Clinging on by digging our fingernails into the earth just as we were about to fall into the abyss a no sale.....time has dragged on, we kept hoping to exchange and then it finally hit me. Why wait for her, get a plan B going, if she buys, great, problem solved. If she doesn't, plan B and C will be fired into action.

That's exactly what I did, I discussed Plan B and C with Dave, told all parties involved and now it is all in action... do I feel better? A whole lot better because I know what I've got to do. And the buyer? Well, I have thought up several reasons for her rather odd and unfair behaviour.

a) She's got postnatal depression and cannot cope with anything

b) her elderly father is ill and therefore her mind has not been on the sale

c) she's anxious about buying a property on her own and having to do some work to it

d) she's unhappy that we would not reduce the price of the house to give her enough money left to make it into her paradise

e) she's changed her mind, but has already forked out money on surveys and solicitors, not to mention time. Therefore finding it hard to be the one to say, sorry, but I don't want the house anymore

f) she is a raving lunatic!

Forget (f) that's just the nasty in me coming out.

Plan B- house now back on the market and viewings to follow

Plan C- house to be put back on the rental market once the 30th Nov, 2010, deadline we have given the buyer runs out.

So, am not just standing there, there being Canada, but rather am doing something, all the way from over here, bit more hassley but by no means impossible.